Industry News

Aussie Impaler aka Eddie Charisma Stars In Mainstream Mockumentary ‘Next Stop Belmondo’

According to this casting site: “STORY LINE: A 70 year old porn producer who is at the end of his career/life decides to make a comeback by making his masterpiece movie with the help of his angry teenage son and in the process heals his relationship with his son and with the love of his life…”

“NOTE: This is NOT a porno movie. It’s a LOVE STORY about a man MAKING a porno movie.”

It’s directed by Lee Donald Taicher.

Shy Love got the Impaler the audition for the movie.

I call Aussie aka Eddie Charisma Tuesday morning.

Aussie: “I’m doing what I do best — swinging my Aussie meat bat around. I’ve got a few directors that couldn’t give a —- what they hear. They like my performance. They like my charisma. They like my large pop shots. They keep lining up these hot little sluts that I keep ramming.

“That’s what I came to Californication for. That’s why I dropped my nail bag in Australia when I was a carpenter for seventeen years. Because I was listening to  “Californication” (Red Hot Chili Peppers) on the radio.”

“You can’t keep a hard man down. They don’t get any harder than the Aussie diggers.”

“It’s going to be at the Cannes Film Festival and the Sundance Film Festival. I’m so wrapped about that. That’s what I came here for — the mainstream. It’s my foot in the door.”

“When I went down to the casting, Don [the director] said, ‘Kid, you’ve got spark. I like it. You’ve got charisma.’

“I said, ‘You’re right. That’s why my name is Charisma.’”

“He said, ‘Not only are you in this one, I’ll catch you on the next one as well.’ I’ll be playing a military role in the next movie — Al Qaeda Vagina.”

“One day I’m going to walk out of the Valley to the other side of the hill and follow in the footsteps of my main man Mel.”

Luke: “How many days were you working on the movie?”

Aussie: “It was a short project — about a couple of weeks. But it was long ass hours, 14 hour days.”

“My legend grows.”

You Might Also Like