I can’t believe, as of this month, I have been in the adult industry for TWENTY years! Celebrating this milestone has made me want to look backward and forward.
It was in my twenties, an innocent babe writer that I started contributing to Xcitement Magazine. I wrote for them since their very first issue, which at that time was a tabloid size newspaper.
The first article I remember contributing was a review of Madonna’s book SEX which was a metal bound book. I didn’t get paid for the article, but they bought me he book and I got to keep it . (wish I still had it!)
The year was 1992. I was attending classes in college for my degree in legal research & studies. I fell into this group of very interesting people, writers, painters, graphic artists who did/had attended the Art Institute of Fort Lauderdale and I spent LOTS of time with them.
All the late nights & long weekends engaged in creativity, writing, discussing, was mostly wonderful! Besides writing for Xcitement, I also had school and a couple part time jobs, but it is a time I look back on as being really tough & sleepless, but also so much fun!
Through the early years I always kept in touch with those creative people, and always had something I had written in every issue of Xcitement.
My remuneration back in those days consisted of shared pizza, a cheap jug of wine and so many naive expectations for the rich people we would all become. It was a time for happy daydreams of our hugely rich future, our fame, all the goals for our future. But the perks expanded to free concerts to review, being treated like VIPs at strip clubs & sports bars, lotsa drinks, lotsa laughs, so much crazy fun times!
And being around people who I could relate too. Those that were different, free thinkers, nonconformists, honest to a fault, but different, out of the box, down to earth, oddballs like myself.
Weird, strange, and hot, those were words used to describe me in high school. The first two hurt, the third caused me problems. I was a virgin until 12th grade, so hot to me meant always fighting off guys who thought my good looks and flirting meant I was ready for sex, but my simplistic, naive Catholic upbringing left me clueless about S_E_X. I was a natural flirt, but had no clue what sex was, and didn’t even understand male sexuality.
I have a very vivid memory of laying on the ground in the snow under a tree, making out with a guy, him standing up, turning away from me and unzipping his pants and peeing. But looking back as an adult now, he wasn’t peeing, he was finishing himself off, jerking off into the snow bank. So sorry about that John, I really didn’t know any better. These days I would have at least lent a helping hand…
But I digress… Back to my time line. I know I am going back & forth through the ages, but that is how Steven King pulls it off!
So during my high school years I was a writer. I wrote for the school newspaper. During my first college courses in my hometown, I wrote for the college paper. I also wrote for a couple of local newspapers,
I always wrote. I was destined to write. I can’t NOT-write. From my third grade short story about a purple people eater that was published in a elementary school anthology, until today where i don’t write as much as i wish i did, but still dream bout writing, think about writing, write in my head, and those stories are really good BTW!
I don’t get to write too much any more. I am not happy about that at all.
sometimes you have to lay in bed and think, reset your life. And at this point in mine that is what I am doing.
My writing these days is in a sad state. I post interesting stories with a few sentences of commentary that i write.
I don’t do much of telling you what i think, because I post all opinions and i don’t want mine to be more important than anyone else’s.
I want this site to continue to be that of all sides of an issue.
But I am rethinking my involvement. Do I continue to be mostly neutral? Do I write more about my opinions? Do I write more overall, and post less of others opinions?
I am at a point of conflict. LIB has been a mission for me now for 4 years. I like that all viewpoints are represented. I spend hours a day to get the site updated and comments flowing.
I am good at the content and conflict. But I don’t have time for the business & ad sales. Thats where I wish I had the backing of a big company like so many other sites do… As a matter of fact, I dont think there is another site for adult news and gossip that is not sponsored by a big buck company.
at this point, LIB is the only site, that big companies, their money & their politics don’t have influence over.
And frankly people, I am getting really tired of doing this site for the goodness of freedom of speech, representing all opinions and being fair..
I’m wanting some advertising, some sponsers, some help. (I want to mention that Hustler has been a consistant contributer & advertiser to this site & I really appreciate it!)
I’m stressed out I cant carry this all on my shoulders any more. I need ur help and ideas on how to turn a well traffic-ed, well-read site into one that is also profitable…