Porn News

Porn Industry Shuts Down in Wake of New STD Outbreak!

For the last week, the Porn industry has been put on ice. If you like fancy words, try moratorium on for size. Such is standard protocol when the adult business has just suffered yet another STD outbreak, the most recent of which happening only last summer in 2011 when a male performer contracted HIV.

What’s the flavor this week? Syphilis. Ew.

This aggressive disease is believed to be brought over by Columbus (thanks asshole) from the Americas. Easily cured by Penicillin, I have no idea why this Dark Age-era sickness is even still around today.

Johnny Depp has syphilis like a mofo in "The Libertine"

Too many pirate hookers for Captain Jack

 

Right now, there are about 9 confirmed cases of adult performers with syphilis. Michael Weinstein of watchdog agency, AIDS Healthcare Foundation did not mince words in his statement to the public:

“When will it end? If we look at the fact that syphilis has up to a 90-day incubation period and the fact that the industry only tests these employees every six months…a person could go as long as nine months without being diagnosed.”

The Real Leak

Prominent adult performer, Mr. Marcus was recently outed as the primary infectee – the rage monkey who started it all. Instead of notifying all his co-workers that he was a carrier, Mr. Marcus altered his test results so he wouldn’t miss anymore work…instead of heeding  the doctor’s recommended sex quarantine of 7-10 days!

Mr. Marcus, oh you big-dick retard. You couldn’t wait a week for your system to clear out an ancient nose-decaying STD?

This whole fiasco is just a quiet build-up to November 6, when L.A citizens will have a chance to vote either for or against the mandatory use of condoms in porn. This has been a years-long battle pitting individual rights against regulatory bodies. In short, the voting outcome will determine whether or not the state government will have the right to tell people how to fuck on film.

My Two Cents

Leading up to that time, voters will no doubt be bombarded by one-sided campaign ads urging for mandatory condom use across the board. Diana Duke of porn lobby group, Free Speech Coalition argues that if the ballot passes, the industry will be forced to go underground, vehemently stating that erotica fans absolutely despise watching condom-enforced porn because the whole thing tramples on the very idea of what porn is and that is FANTASY.

I think it’s unfair for these regulatory bodies to bully the adult industry into making a product that their fans don’t want to see. Adult performers make up a tiny, miniscule percentage of people living in California. There’s been 2 confirmed cases of HIV in the last ten years, while a statistical survey report states that of the 6,500 new HIV cases between 2008 and 2011, absolutely none were caught off a porn set.

There’s people walking around right now carrying all sorts of nightmarish STDs gleaned from the neighborhood swamp donkey. They’ll live blissfully in ignorance because let’s face the truth, nobody likes getting tested.

That just doesn’t happen in porn. Performers adhere to strict testing procedures and while the system is not perfect by any means, at least there’s regular screening and that is more than I can say about 99.9 percent of the rest of the world.

 

You Might Also Like