Industry News

Porn Stars As Educators

I’ve been with a few porn stars and in my view they generally beat the pants off civilians in bed.

In particular, I find porn stars more skilled at giving oral sex. Civilians often use their teeth, with painful results. Porn stars know how to apply smooth suction.

Also, I like the way porn stars moan and pretend to be really into having sex with you. That it is the highlight of their life and that they have never been with anyone who arouses them as much as you.

Third, porn stars tend to praise your appendage, no matter how small and droopy it is.

Fourth, porn stars know how to tease you.

Fifth, porn stars don’t depend on you to provide them pleasure. You can do pretty much anything you want to them and porn stars appear to love it.

Sixth, most porn stars have no problem with being the submissive partner in bed. Regular women tend to give way too many directions. If you’re as unlucky as I’ve been, you’ll hook up with a feminist who won’t do missionary because it reflects the subjugation of women.

Having sex with a porn star is like being listened to by your therapist. Unlike regular folks, a therapist really listens. They concentrate. They treat what you say as important and then they give thoughtful feedback. It is the ultimate in narcissistic supply.

I’ve slept with about 40 women in my life. I’ve gained great wisdom through these experiences that I want to pass on to you.

First. I am grateful to any woman who’ll have me. Even bad sex is better than no sex (unless the woman turns into a psycho down the road).

Second. The best sex is with the most mentally disturbed chicks.

Third. Only about one woman in ten gives a great blowjob and only about one woman in 20 gives a great handjob.

Fourth. Most women smell funny down there. Some smell really bad. Yet some don’t smell at all. That’s cool when they keep it fresh.

Five. I don’t like women who move too much. It can throw me off my game.

Six. I put the half-life of a sexual relationship at a month. After three months, I’d usually rather play chess.

Which porn stars and porn movies serve as the best role models for civilian women to emulate in the sack?

Together we can make a better world.

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