Editorials

Porn Stars Read Dr. Seuss

Pornstars Read Dr Seuss

Dr. Seuss Read By Porn Stars Is Everything You Never Knew You Wanted To Hear

Here follows a short poem I wrote this morning after discovering possibly the best video I’ve seen all month, and that includes the video I saw last week of the puppy sneezing and falling over.

It was early this morn
At my desk, sorting porn
When a video I did see!
It was six minutes long,
and contained not one schlong,
and I felt a great big surge of glee.

For porn stars were reading,
and wildly succeeding
in reciting a childhood favorite.
A familiar white book,
this task undertook,
daunting, but surely they’d brave it.

“Oh, the places you’ll go,”
one had said to the cam,
and the rest of them followed in suit.
Reading clearly and loud,
not-a-one being plowed,
but instead reading Seuss, being cute.

It did sound suggestive,
though surprisingly festive,
and a nice change of pace, I’m sure,
for these women who spent
all their days being bent
over couches, and fucked on the floor.

I laughed til I cried,
and then wiped my eyes dry,
and I sat down to write a blog post.
A poem seemed fitting,
so here I am sitting,
writing limericks, and eating my toast.

My rhyming crapped out,
and now I will pout,
for my poem will draw to an end.
But never you fear,
for these porn stars are here
reading Seuss, to you, dear friends.

—–

The video includes (fully-clothed) appearances by Kenna James, Holly West, Shay Fox, AJ Applegate, Ally Brooks, Jessica Jaymes, and Allie Haze, among many others.

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