Porn is a mysterious place full of intrigue, drama, love, and cocaine…
One thing that isn’t a mystery is James “Sniff Sniff” Bartholet.
My only question here is, did he tweet that before or after his morning line?
Trust me, this dude hasn’t been sober for 4 days, much less 4 years.
Here’s a list of 10 things more likely to happen before James Bartholet gets sober:
10. Dakota Skye getting a new laptop.
9. MindGeek cutting off Keiran Lee’s penis to collect on the 1 million dollar penis insurance policy
8. Brian Berke getting over his belly button fetish.
7. Johnny Goodluck’s Motor Cycle club beating me up.
6. Ginger Banks shutting the fuck up.
5. Johnny Castle’s business partner West Coast Kev not beating girls anymore.
4. Axel Braun cracking 3% on minority hiring.
3. Jonathan Morgan will stop telling companies a Nexxxt Level talent is unavailable for a shoot but his girlfriend is available.
2. Lauren Phillips stops lying about being a natural redhead.
1. TRPWL will let a sweaty Erika Icon sit on his face after she does two hours of cardio.