Editorials

Vintage Orgasm Faces From The 70’s

Vintage 70's Porn Face

60’s and 70’s vintage porn is goddamn hilarious, especially compared to today’s smutty glitz and glamour. Back in the day, there was nothing to do but skate around in knee-highs at the local roller derby and smoke doobies at drive-in theaters. This was around the time when Porn really was born. Slews of creative directors presumably with giant lambchop sideburns began putting scripts together, hiring other mega-mustachioed studs and of course, hot little disco babes to star in their movies. I’ll call them movies because that’s what these vintage pornos wanted to be. These old skin flicks even had their own soundtracks played by real musicians with real songs laced with blatant sexual lyrics versus today’s tired, old stock music that’s about as inspired as an outdated laugh track. We’ve come a long way and sometimes the changing of the times doesn’t always equate to moving forward but that’s a post for another day.

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Today, I salute all things vintage and vintage Porn deserves to be recognized for its beautiful actresses, the uber-hairy dudes who are grandfathering today’s bearded hipsters and the goddamn hilarious faces they make when a real cute bunny is licking their wieners, can you dig it?

Here’s a collection of funny and hilarious orgasm faces from real vintage pornos! Then, check out real scenes of vintage porn that I’ve cherry-picked personally from Porn.com’s vault! To see more far out vintage porn videos, just click here for more.

1.) Nirvana Eyes

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Would you just look at these jack-asses. Helmet-hair on the left looks like trying to piss during an acid trip and Brillo hair on the right looks like he just finished one.

2.) The Karaoke Face

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Don’t ask me why the schmuck on the left has a baker’s hat and just a bow tie on. It’s probably during the part of the “movie” where his man curds get swallowed. As for the John Fogerty lookalike on the right, I can’t tell if that’s blowjob face or bohemian-rhapsody-karaoke-face.

3.) The Multi-Taskers

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These disco-loving multi-taskers have got swag for days. Instead of looking constipated, one dude is chugging a beer whilst getting head and the other is lighting up a cigar as he gets his own pole smoked!

4.) The Constipators

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The groovy dude on the left is what I look like when I go drain my lizard and the fellow on the right is your classic beer shits grimace. Once more, with feeling!

Below are some more awesome vintage cum faces and I’ve even included links to the original betamax video clip so you can check it out and watch it for free! I hope you enjoyed my collection of orgasm faces from back in the day!

Click on the pics below to watch the video!

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Let’s take a moment and give it up to the Godfather himself…Ron Jeremy. Now that’s a vintage porn look!

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