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What is love? Hint it has nothing to do with your Fleshlight

When the moon hits your eye, like a big pizza pie, that’s Amore. When the world seems to shine, like you’ve had too much wine, that’s Amore. Love. Sure, even Hollywood has resigned itself to showing us a little reality here and there. Some internal conflict. But the main characters always sweep it together in the end and awkward confessions lead to much anticipated kisses. Happily ever after. It’s easy and beautiful and everything will be alright because they are in love. And when you’re in love, you’re vulnerable…but you’re invincible. The same endorphins that pump through your veins when you skip a step and your heart trembles are the ones that turn your blood to fire when that special someone brushes up against you or offers you a smile. Hence the phrase Falling in Love. It’s the feeling that we are all searching for. Love. The strongest feeling in the world.

But you see, that is the problem. That is where we get it wrong.

Love, real love, is not a feeling. Love is an action. Love is a daily dedication. It’s doing the dishes for her when you know she isn’t expecting you to. But you also know that she hates doing them. It’s taking the trash out for him after he’s had a hard day…even if you have too. It’s rolling over every morning and counting every single way you love them while you watch them sleeping.

I’ll be honest here, I don’t know a single girl that wouldn’t smile if their significant other presented them with a flower, store bought or stolen from the neighbor’s yard. I don’t know a single guy that doesn’t need to be reminded that he’s studly and appreciated. It’s in the acts that cost us nothing but mean everything that lasting relationships are built.

Go out of your way to mention how beautiful she looks. Kiss his shoulder and remind him how much you appreciate him. Let them know that you are a safe place for them to laugh or cry without judgment and that you are grateful for their trust and vulnerability. Believe in them. You are with them for a reason, remind them of that reason, every day…doing this will ensure that you never forget it.

If it sounds like a lot of work, it is. And if you find that special someone, I promise it will be worth it.

But if you were reading this article thinking “Ain’t nobody got time for that”, you definitely aren’t alone. Don’t be afraid! This doesn’t mean that you’re forever doomed to fleshlights if drama isn’t your llama. Wild things that refuse to be tamed with domesticity, I admire you. Flying solo doesn’t mean you don’t deserve someone hot, wet and warm to devour you! Free spirits like you are designed for no strings dating and the new world of dating apps and social media is at your fingertips.

However, if all else fails and you have a quiet night ahead there’s no shame in pumping one out to your favorite blogger.

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