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Woman who got addicted to porn at 12

Just when you start thinking you have seen and heard it all, the world comes up with a new surprise. This time around, in the form of a woman who got hooked on porn at age 12 and even hosted parties four times a week so that she could meet with men for sex. The woman, Erica Garza got addicted to porn at such a young age and confessed that she struggled to get aroused or even have sexual intercourse without a dose of her favorite porn videos. In a memoir titled ‘Getting Off’, she tells it all, including boasting about how she hated condoms and how she ruined a relationship with a man she loved by cheating on him with a man she met on holiday and a French waiter.

Promiscuous adult

How did she move from being a self-conscious Catholic schoolgirl to a promiscuous adult? Well, her porn habit started when she was struggling to fit into middle school in Montebello, Los Angeles. Her main source of insecurity was having to wear a back brace because she suffered from scoliosis. She was bullied because of that condition, and her only solace was watching soft-core porn on late-night cable TV. As she progressed her teenage years, so did technology and she was able to use her cellphone to stream porn anytime she wanted. At 15, she vividly remembers the leaked Pamela Anderson and Tommy Lee sex tape that came out in 1997.

“What I got was an elaborate mixture of shame and sexual excitement I had come to depend on since I was 12 years old,” Garza, now a monogamous and married mother of one, writes.

“My methods of getting this only became darker and more intense, wreaking havoc on all aspects of my life.”

Thrill of getting caught

Erica writes that she used to hide with her computer in her bedroom closet. Her main thrill? Is that she would get caught. Fortunately or unfortunately (conditional on the way you are looking at this), she was never caught. She watched porn for a good five years before losing her virginity at 17. From there, it got to a point where she could not imagine intercourse without watching hard-core porn. The fact that her favorite porn video included two women being ritually humiliated during group sex in a factory speaks volumes regarding her tastes.

“If I felt uncomfortable with the person I was having sex with, I put on porn as a kind of distraction,” added Erica, who says her male lovers thought of her as ‘cool’ because of her interest in porn.  She added, “It felt like a relief for me because we had a sort of wall between us, and we didn’t have to get as [emotionally] intimate as we could have.”

Risky sex

Her ‘dangerous’ behavior didn’t stop after she finished college. In fact, she continued engaging in violent and risky sex as she moved to Hawaii, LA, London and New York. It involved fucking with strangers without using condoms. Her porn preferences also moved from, soft-core to hardcore such as with her favorite scene in the factory featuring “two sweaty women and 50 horny men.”

Her real-life sexual encounters involved similar scenes to the ones in porn where women are demeaned. After such encounters, she felt ‘broken, unlovable, worthless and used,’ she said. However, she confessed that she was also using the men for her own needs.

‘Every time I did these things, or confessed to hating condoms, or to having an unusually high sex drive, I hoped the guys liked me even more than they seemed to,’ she writes.

“I think it was the element of shock,” she said.

House parties

The silky shaved looks of the actresses greatly influenced her. She spent as much as £40 every three weeks on Brazilian wax so her pussy would be hair free.

Then there were the house parties. In her 20s, she would throw house parties up to 4 times a week so she could hook up with men, using her love for porn as a way of attracting them. All the things she did, which included confessions of hating condoms or having an unusually high sex drive were meant to make the guys like her even more than they seemed to.

“I was one of them, I thought, and not like other girls. When my confessions would elicit laughs or high-fives or nods of recognition, I’d feel a rush of what I thought was intimacy,” she said.

Erica also had serious relationships, but they all ended bitterly. At some point, she was engaged to some guy, but the relationship ended because of her obsession with the idea that the man was cheating on her.

She also had another affair which lasted three years after she fucked a Colombian guy she had met on holiday. Instead of working to salvage the relationship, she slept with a French waiter instead. That alone should describe her sex drive.

Meeting her husband

In her early 30s, she realized that her infatuations were acting as a barrier, preventing her from bonding with men. Luckily for her, that changed when she met with her now-husband, a 39-year-old app designer, on a trip to Bali. They initially watched porn together because it was her habit until her husband wanted to talk to her about her porn habit because he hadn’t encountered such a woman before.

“For the first time, I really felt that I could be safe, supported and reveal who I was.”

With the help of her husband, Willow Neilson, with whom she has a child, therapy and spending time at a yoga retreat, she was able to fight off her addiction. However, she didn’t completely stop her porn-watching habit, but she only watches occasionally and “healthily.”

Conclusion

Erica Garza’s story proves that nobody is immune to porn and sex addiction. Sex/porn addiction is mostly regarded as a man’s “problem” and not a woman’s. However, Erica seems to dispel such a notion in her tell it all memoir. A wise man once said watch your habits before they become who you are, the habit of frequently watching porn is no exemption.

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